His Key to Love
by Justice Tokidoki
Summary: Kairi and Sora discuss the main issue that led to their breakup. When she inquires about the new love in his life, Sora decides to reveal a secret that even he doesn't fully understand. {Post KH2}.


**PART I: INTRODUCTION**

Kairi gave Sora a warm smile as he approached, waving him over. "Hey, it's been a while."

He nodded. "Too long. I hate separations."

She chuckled. "I know the feeling." All too well she knew. But she had to admit, it's not necessarily the same when one barely remembers the person they were separated from. The confusion, the probing, the whole process to get back to Sora was daunting enough.

However, their current separation was another beast entirely. The consuming emotional swings that took her when they had broken up belonged in a different category. But she had convinced herself that she was over it.

Or, at least, she was curious enough to have a conversation with Sora to find out who had stolen his heart from her. "Anyway, I'm sure this wasn't easy for you. I gave you a hard time last time we talked. I should have listened instead of breaking down like that." She winced briefly, remembering how she had cried and basically ran off before Sora could utter another word.

_That won't be a problem this time_, she told herself. _I'm ready to hear the truth._

His lips stretched into a thin smile. His hands twitched and he rubbed them together, breathing into his palms. "It's okay. I kind of expected that. From your perspective, it probably didn't make much sense."

She grunted in agreement. There was no question on either side that Sora dumping her came out of left field. "It was very surprising."

"Yeah . . . but you do understand that it had nothing to do with you, right?"

She shook her head. "Yes, yes, but come on. We don't have to rehash that." She took a sip from her coffee. "You wanted to introduce me to the other girl, right? When will she be here?"

"Oh, umm, about that." He lowered his gaze, fidgeting more in his seat. "It's not a girl."

"Oh." So he was into guys? For some oddly, unsettling reason, this didn't surprise her at all. "So it's Riku?"

Sora blinked rapidly, mouth popping open in a way that almost made her laugh. "What? Riku? Where did that come from?"

_Oops. _"Sorry, I was just, I mean, I assumed—."

"No." He rubbed his eyes, almost forcing a laugh. He leaned back against his chair, groaning. "If it was Riku it would be a lot easier to tell you."

Face red, she cleared her throat. "I see. I'm sorry. I'll let you tell your story now."

"It's kind of long."

She smiled, holding up her cup towards him encouragingly. "Well, today's your day. I promised you that. Say whatever you have to."

"Thanks." He let out a deep breath. "Okay, well, I guess it started when Riku and I just got back. It was a crazy time. We were finally home, we got to hang out with you, saw our other friends . . . I felt normal."

"Right." She sat up in her seat while keeping her hands over her lap. "Everyone was really excited to see you."

His eyes sparkled and his smile alerted her that he was somewhere in the past. "I know. Mom was probably thrilled the most. I helped out a lot, fixed up my old room. It's crazy that all that time had passed and . . . I nearly forgot about her. About everyone. Well, everyone except you."

Try as she might, she couldn't stop herself from blushing. "That makes sense."

"I always liked you, Kairi. It was easy to like you. I think everyone would agree with that." His grin nearly melted her heart. "But I wasn't in love. I know that now."

Kairi blinked. "You do?"

"Yes. When you asked me out on a date, I was pretty happy, but I was also confused. I didn't really know what to do. I thought I would mess up our friendship." His voice started to shake. "When we were together something was missing. It was different than how I felt in the past."

"Different how?"

"Well . . . I can't . . ." His teeth sunk into his bottom lip hard enough to break skin. His hands traveled up into his spikes, churning into it as if he were rolling out dough. "Ugh, this is so hard."

"I think you'll feel better if you just tell me their name. That should make it easier." Her heart swarmed up as she took in his awkward pose. It reminded her of how she felt when she first confessed to him. "Just start with the person and how they make you feel."

When his hands slammed into the table she nearly jumped out of her seat. It was so sudden that she almost spilled her coffee. He brought his head up, taking in more deep breaths as his right hand continued to shake, and in a burst of light his Keyblade appeared. The metal reflected her face, showing every pore and stress line as it stretched into a panicked shape.

With precise, careful motions, Sora gently pushed it to the center of the table. "Sorry . . . I couldn't keep him in anymore."

Kairi blinked. _Did I say something wrong? Wait a minute . . . him?_ "I'm sorry?"

She completely shut her mouth as he his hand reached out, lightly sliding against the teeth of the blade. He made a shushing sound, voice soft. "I'm sorry. I know that was hard for you. But I couldn't just come in and—," he paused, tilting his head. His eyes were solely trained on the glowing blade. "Yeah, I know. Don't worry."

Kairi didn't know what to think. Or rather, her thoughts couldn't be contained. Everything she wanted to say was running around in her head like rabid dogs. _Is this for real? Am I actually watching Sora stroke a key? Wait, why is he talking to it? Why—_

"Kairi? You okay?"

"I . . . what?"

"You look a little pale."

She shook her head, shifting her eyes from him to the Keyblade taking up most of the table. "No, I'm . . . confused . . ."

He sighed. "Well . . . I'm just going to say it." He gestured to the blade. "When I said that there was someone else I really wasn't talking about a person." He took a hold of her hand then moved it over towards the golden handle of his beloved. "Kairi, this is Kyle and he is the love of my life."

**PART II: THE FIRST ENCOUNTER**

_It happened again._

_He had been thinking about his mom's meatloaf again, his favorite childhood dish, before being whisked off to dreamland with all the foods he enjoyed. The food fell around him in clumps, forming into rainclouds. Then, he was drenched. Rain, so much rain . . . and not just any type of rain. _

_The sky was crying. Thousands of hearts were rising into the sky. With each heart lost in the clouds a heartless would fall to the ground, taking its place. They would pile up, surrounding him, breathing all over him. _

_There was no other option. He'd have to fight. His right hand would twitch, the signal, but nothing would appear. His companion, his guide, his soul, it wouldn't appear. Instead he was alone with the darkness. _

_Every time this happened he would feel weak. He couldn't fight without a weapon, without the solid force of light in his palm. No, he couldn't survive without it. He wouldn't even try. It was too painful. _

_So, he'd sit on the ground and wait. The creatures would press against him, tear into his body, but that never bothered him. What bothered him was that something was missing. Something so important, so vital, that just admitting that it wasn't there would send him into a panic. _

_The heartless knew it. Hell, everyone knew it. _

_Sora was missing something. Everyone around him expressed that._

Am I awake? Or am I still dreaming?_ Sora opened his eyes and blue eyes stared straight back at him. He felt like jumping back but then he realized that he was staring at his reflection._

_He breathed out a sigh of relief, closing his eyes. "Ugh, again?" He groaned, rubbing his face against the metal, muttering about how he wanted the "food" part of his dream to last longer. He brought his hand up below the Keyblade's teeth, rubbing it. "How come I can't summon you when I'm asleep, huh? That's not fair."_

_He rolled away, trying to unsummon the useless weapon, but instead of moving away from it the Keyblade seemed to roll over with him. He gasped and stared at his legs. He was in the fetal position and his legs were wrapped around the Keyblade just above the hilt. He squealed and shoved the Key away, watching it fall off his bed and land on the floor. _

_It lost some of its shine, but it was still bright enough to make his wooden floorboards look that much worse. He frowned at it, rubbing his eyes. "Ugh, it's like you have a mind of your own." He sat up, promptly shooting his right arm up, snapping his fingers. "Now come back."_

_He could feel it, practically see the Keyblade's light fade and shimmer into transparency. He could almost feel it in his hand. But when he blinked and flicked his wrist nothing happened (like all the other countless nights of interrupted sleep). He groaned, falling back against his bed. "Bet Riku doesn't have to deal with this."_

_He sighed and brought his hand up, prepared to wipe his brow, when he froze midway, staring at the golden handle locked grimly in his palm. "Okay, now you're just being mean."_

_With one glance at the clock, he settled in for another uncomfortable and restless night. Not once did he question why he felt the need to talk to his Keyblade. Not once did he question how his body felt as he threw the Keyblade against the wall in anger. _

_What he did wonder about was why he couldn't seem to control the one thing that had defined his existence for so long. And arguably the most important of all . . . he was beginning to wonder if the Keyblade was truly just a "thing" after all._

**PART III: OPINIONS**

Roxas' stare could make anyone feel self-conscious. In Sora's case, it was both aggravating and practically an insult. He had never wanted to punch someone so hard. "Roxas, I'm serious."

"So let me get this straight. You're having a hard time with Kairi because you think that you're really in love . . . with a key?"

Sora rubbed the space between his eyebrow and forehead. Talking to Roxas was a surefire way to bring on a migraine, both physically and mentally. He was beginning to understand why he didn't delve too deep into his own mind very often. "Yes."

"Uh huh. Can I ask you one more question?"

"I guess."

"Are you insane?"

Sora frowned, crossing his arms. "Look, I wouldn't bring this up if I didn't think it was true."

Roxas held up a hand. "Stop. Just stop. Because I don't think I've ever heard something this ridiculously stupid. I mean, do you even hear yourself? You're going to ruin a good thing you have going over a weapon?"

"It's not that! Or, at least . . . that's not how it feels to me." Sora looked away. "And I don't expect you to understand. Our hearts our different, I can't fully explain what it's like to be in love this way . . . but . . . I'm done doubting myself. I can't just bring out my Keyblade anymore. I can't control it . . . and I don't think I was ever meant to control it."

"I think you're confused. That's your problem right there." Roxas shrugged. "What you need to do is suck it up and stop thinking too hard. Kairi doesn't hate you, the worlds are in balance, and I am not going to sit here and discuss how you should break up with Kairi over a key."

Sora sighed. "I don't have to think, I just _know_. I don't want to hurt anyone, especially Kairi. But I can't lie to her either. It wouldn't be right."

With a humongous eye-roll Roxas collapsed in front of him, leaning back and staring at the ceiling (which was really just a revolving swirl of colors. Mind logic). "Can you at least tell me why?"

"Can you explain what love is? Have you ever been in love?"

"Love is a pretty strong word, Sora."

"Yeah, I know . . . I don't think I'll ever understand it. Not the way everyone else does." Sora sat next to him while wrapping his knees up against himself. "I'm different, Roxas. Everyone seems to be in a hurry to get a girlfriend and boyfriend. I barely got back to the islands. I just . . . I've never felt that way. I mean, sure, Riku and I fought over Kairi . . . but that was just another thing for us to compete at."

"Yeah . . . don't tell her that. Way to make her feel like an object."

Sora's eyes widened. "See! That's what I mean! My Keyblade . . . I mean . . . the Keyblade . . . it doesn't feel like an object to me. I talk to it and . . . it talks back to me."

"The key . . . talks to you? Nice."

"Hey, knock it off!" Sora shoved him. "I'm serious, okay? It's not the same as if I'm talking to you, but I know how it feels . . . and it's different. It's not even an "it," I . . . I don't know."

Roxas let out this long sigh. It wasn't apathetic. In fact, Sora could have sworn that he saw tears forming in the adamant boy's eyes. "Sora . . . you sound insane."

"Well . . . isn't that kind of what love is? It doesn't really make sense but . . . it's there. If I was talking about a person you wouldn't be asking me these questions." Sora pouted and stretched his legs out, tilting his head back. "Maybe love is the wrong word. But I know that I feel closer to the Keyblade than to Kairi." It almost stung to say those words, but he couldn't think of any other way to describe it.

Roxas' bottom lip trembled as he sat up, staring straight ahead. "Okay, let me ask you this. When you're by yourself, what comes to your mind almost instantly? Like, when you're daydreaming."

"This a trick question?"

Roxas glared at him and Sora blushed, frowning. "Fine, but don't laugh." Sora stared up as he tried to recall what invaded his brain on practically a daily basis now. "Keys."

". . . Seriously?"

"Yes. All the different forms the Keyblade takes whenever I'm using it. Every world it was different, and I like picturing how it changes, all the little details in the handle and the keychains and the slashing part of the . . . you know, the parts that we would point at the keyholes."

"Uh huh."

"Yeah, I think of that and how I'd have to hold each one a little differently but sometimes in the same way. And I think about how each one would give me a different set of strengths, how each place would be so different but the Keyblade . . . it just doesn't fail. It keeps changing and getting better and cooler, and then—."

"Sora!"

"Whuh?"

"You're putting me to sleep."

He smirked once as Sora shoved him again with a not so light kick to the back. "I hate you."

Roxas laughed bitterly. "Well . . . I guess you're telling the truth."

Sora had his hand raised to strike again. He kept his hand up while giving Roxas a skeptical look. "Oh, so now you believe me." He imitated Roxas' eye-roll before crossing his arms. "Thanks a lot."

"Well, if you're telling me the truth, there's nothing I can do to change anything. So go ahead. Screw Kairi over and come crying your guts out to me later."

Sora wilted, curling back into his previous pose. "She's going to hate me, isn't she?"

"I don't know. I can't imagine anyone being happy when they realize they were dumped for a key. But you'll probably figure something out."

"Thanks. You're such a pal."

Roxas gave him a small smile. "It's better this way. It wouldn't be genuine if I told you what to say."

Sora narrowed his eyes. "You just want to see me fail."

"I've seen enough of that. Try winning for a change."

The conversation was cycling back into another round of arguing. Why did talking to Roxas have to be so frustrating? "Winning isn't easy."

"Nothing is easy for you." Roxas stood up, rocking back and forth on his heels. "You about done? My throat is kind of sore."

"Your fault for yelling." Sora jumped up, popping the tension out of his knuckles. "You at least owe me an honest answer."

"Fine. Whatever."

Instead of shoving him (though he really wanted to), Sora opted for the peaceful approach. With a calm voice, he spoke evenly. "What do you think about when your mind's not under control?"

Surprisingly, to Sora anyway, Roxas answered without hesitation. "The clock tower back in Twilight town."

"Oh, I see. With Xion and Axel?"

Roxas shook his head. "No. Just the tower."

They stared at each other for a few minutes. Roxas' face slowly grew red as Sora smiled knowingly.

"Don't you start getting any funny ideas!"

"I didn't say anything."

**PART IV: CONFESSION**

"So . . . you're dating . . . a Keyblade?" Kairi had to say the sentence slowly just to make sense of it. It still sounded off no matter how many times she ran it over in her own head.

"Well, yes technically, but he likes to be referred to by name." Sora took out a cloth and started meticulously rubbing Kyle's hilt. "But I understand how weird that can be. So, if you have to say Keyblade, just make sure you don't say "Sora's Keyblade" because he doesn't like that either."

"I see." She rubbed her own arm, tilting her head. "Uh, it's nice to meet you . . . ermmmm."

"Kyle."

". . . Interesting name."

He blushed before looking away. "I know, Roxas had a very . . . strong opinion about it too. Kyle wants a name change, but I'm so used to calling him that. It's kind of hard." He sat up straight, his face proud as he looked over Kyle's thoroughly shined silver skin. "But, we're working on it."

"So, you're . . . attracted to him?"

At this question, Sora nearly fell out of his seat. He didn't think about how to talk about this side of his relationship. He swallowed nervously. No matter what, he was going to be honest. "Well . . . yes, I do."

Kairi smiled sadly. "That must be hard."

He shrugged. "Not really. I mean, it's different than what most people think when it comes to . . . uh, dating and whatnot." He gripped Kyle by his hilt. "It's different for everyone. For instance, if someone else grabbed Kyle like this, it wouldn't feel right to me. But the way Kyle acts after that . . . it's not really a pretty sight."

"You mean he gets mad?" All she could picture was a floating Keyblade whacking random people on the head and she winced.

"Oh yeah. It's much harder to hold him and then he won't let me summon him." Sora glared briefly at his now self-described "flighty" companion. "We have talks about that a lot. That's actually how it started."

"When you first developed feelings for it?"

"Well, it was the first time I realized that what I was dealing with wasn't simply just . . . a thing. Everything was different after that. I had a really hard time sleeping and this guy—," he emphasized Kyle by pointing at him, "just wouldn't cooperate. But of course, once I brought up how Riku had it easier he settled down. Apparently, he's very competitive."

Kairi chuckled. "Huh . . ."

"Yeah, anyway, that's my story." He breathed out in relief. The conversation was harder than he had imagined, but now that he was finally done he could relax. Even if Kairi truly hated him now, the guilt of omission was finally lifted from his shoulders. "It's kind of crazy. But I wanted to tell you the truth. Ummm . . . so . . ."

"Hmmm, is it alright if I asked a few more questions?" She really wanted to understand. I mean, looking at the thing (Kyle, his name is Kyle) so highly praised in front of her, she knew it couldn't be a trick. She knew Sora long enough to get that none of it was a lie. And yet her mind, and heart, couldn't accept it. "First of all, just to reiterate . . . I mean, you didn't break up because of anything I did, right?"

"No. Trust me, if anything, I really wanted to keep our relationship going. If only to keep you happy." He sighed. "But it wouldn't have been fair to you."

"Right." She took in what he said and waited a few minutes to relax. "Are you happy now?"

His grin lifted her spirits. "Now that I told you? Yep."

"That's good to know." She stared at her coffee (now cold, she barely even looked at it when Sora started delving deeper into his story). "Do you think there are others?"

"By others you mean . . ?" He raised an eyebrow.

"Well, people who love . . ," she bit her bottom lip, trying to think of the right word to say. She decided on the obvious one. "Objects?"

"Hmmmm, well, Roxas is one." He grabbed Kyle's hilt and whispered a few words before a flash of light made their guest disappear. "Me and Kyle were going to head to Twilight town after this. We're doing it to surprise him."

She smiled. "The clock tower?"

"How did you know?" Sora's wide eyes nearly made her laugh.

"I remember seeing it once. It was very long ago, back when I had a hard time remembering you." She looked up, counting with her hands. "Can't remember when exactly, but it was pretty distinct. Roxas went there a lot, right?"

"Yeah! It's a pretty special place. After all, he met all his friends there." Sora smiled. "Do you want to tag along?"

She thought for a moment. _Well, today sure was crazy. But . . . no matter what, he's still Sora. And none of what happened was my fault. I should accept that._ She smiled. "Thanks, but I'm going to crash early. You and Riku may be chill about school, but I'm planning to make up for what I missed and reach the top regardless."

He laughed. "Of course. Just don't push yourself too hard."

"I won't make any promises." She threw her coffee away, then slung her bag over her shoulder. "But, ummm, thanks for telling me. I know that wasn't easy."

He gave her a signature thumbs up. "Well, we'll see. I still have to tell Riku and I have no idea how that's going to go." He smiled. "But I owed you. Thanks for listening."

They hugged, both feeling the bittersweet undertones in the motion. She waved at the cross streets before they parted for good, heading their separate ways. Though she had quieted her heart somewhat, she couldn't help but stand there, watching him grow faint. Before he faded completely from view she saw a flash of light, and smiled as he shifted his right hand up, letting the Keyblade rest against his shoulder before going down the hill and away from her into the horizon.


End file.
